atlasofthehumanheartIt’s a funny thing; Before embarking on my journey to becoming a famous writer before I’m dead, I read books like Ariel Gore’s Atlas of the Human Heart without any real thought to the writer behind the story. But reading it with the eyes of a writer made me want to crawl into the pages and hug Gore for her honesty, high-five her for her bravery, and beg her to share a cup of coffee with me just so I could…you know…bask.

She could have lied. She could have called it a novel. But she didn’t. And for that, Gore kicks ass.

I want to write a story like Gore’s. I might not be able to compete; I have no world-traveler at the age of 15, smuggling, squatting, wise-beyond-my-years, teen- mom-leaves-abusive- boyfriend true tales to add to my own life story. What I do have is my own story and a new appreciation for memoir writing.

I just want to be able to turn off the noise in my head and the fear I’ve been letting masquerade as writer’s block so I  can finally sit down and just write, already. Gore is my inspiration; and her Atlas is my guide.

 

A recent tweet sent out into the twittersphere by yours truly.

@aspiringmama: Dear agent: my platform-the houseplants survived so I got dogs. The dogs survived so I had a kid. She’s 2 now & I am still sane = platform

“Nuff said.


 

I’m pretty sure it’s documented somewhere that I’m about 16 different kinds of crazy. Okay, fine…maybe 17.

I lose my keys in my purse all the time, will forget what I am saying if I see something shiny, and am pretty sure that The Husband signed me up for Lasik eye surgery a few years ago because he got tired of helping me find my glasses on my face.

So what makes me think I can keep up with yet another blog? Because as long as I have a pen shoved in my bra (trust me, it’s perfectly happy next to my blackberry and not in danger of getting lost) and a notebook in my back pocket, I have the time to quickly jot down the little moments unique to the parenting experience and then quickly type them out in a blog post, click “save,” and then schedule a publishing date. I already have nine posts up and ready to go, which gives my brain a nice little vacation.

I officially launched The Afterbirth a few days ago, and am pretty pleased so far. No one’s beating down my door with a publishing contract (yet) but no one has told me I suck at this writing thing and need to go back to devoting my life’s work to asking people if they are interested in today’s specials or my last gig as a peon without a byline at a big city newspaper. So I’m gonna keep on keepin’ on.

Parenting and the memories I’m collecting as I go is really made up of a bunch of little moments that flitter in and out of my head faster than Buttercup is growing. With inspiration from sites like Six Word Stories and A Small Stone, I decided to channel those random thoughts into a blog dedicated to the creative inspirations born every moment since I became a mother. They are short, punchy, and probably would look really good on a T-shirt. Hey, I’m just sayin’.

I’m not pretentious enough to call it poetry. But it is something I think other parents will relate to.

So go ahead and take a look. Let me what you think.

And if you happen to get the creative urge to share, drop me a line. I don’t have a specific word limit or format in mind; just share what you would honestly have time to write out before your own little muses say “Mom” again. There…time’s up.

 

Desert moon dips in sandy clouds that

dance across the skies as

October winds caress my cheeks.

I smile at the rainbow that hugs her.

 

I swear I’m married to the only straight man in the history of the world who notices a new pair of shoes hidden under the cuffs of my flare-bottom jeans. I bet my mom $5 he’d notice, and she owes me.

We trekked out to the stores the other day for a little retail therapy and The Husband knew I was coming home with A pair of cross trainers (for the workouts I keep promising myself I’m gonna do). But I found the cutest pair of Skechers that were just calling my name. So I left with two boxes and rationalized that the Skechers were actually an investment since they would be my dedicated everyday shoes and therefore would save my new Pumas from needless abuse and thereby lengthen their precious lifespan by months while I troll around the house and Tucson doing Mom-stuff and really, that totally makes the sixty extra bucks I spent on the second pair of shoes a smart move on my part, right?

Right?

And yet, a little part of my was really hoping this would be the one time in our entire relationship that The Husband would not use his “I’m Observant, not gay” powers of observation to scope out the new kicks I was planning on sneaking in.

I didn’t make it two steps in the door when he oh-so-casually says, “New shoes, huh?”

Shit.

Keep in mind that I had purposely left the empty box for the Skechers I wore home at the damned store to try and cover my ass. Not that it mattered. I’ve tried everything, including the classic “Buy It Now and Hide It in My Closet for Three Months” move before walking past The Husband in the shoes/dress/T-shirt/Purse I had thought I had so brilliantly Deep-Covered into my wardrobe only to have to answer a raised eyebrow accompanied by a “And how long have you had that?”

“What?” I’d blurt out in my best “What the hell are you smoking now?” voice.

“The (insert item here) you thought you were gonna get passed me.”

“Oh,” eyes wide and oh-so-not-innocent. “I’ve had it for months.” Which was technically true. Gimme that lie detector!

By this time, he’d be laughing. Hard. “I’m surprised you made it this long before pulling it out. That must have killed you!”

Oh snap.

Busted again.

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