Let me preface this post by saying that we painted Buttercup’s nursery a neutral shade of soft green, avoided All Things Pink until she decided pink was her favorite color somewhere around 18 months, and had a strict Anti-Barbie policy when it came to the dolls allowed in our home.
Only three channels are allowed on the television (Nick Jr., PBS Kids, and Disney Juniorbefore all those mindless Hannah Montana type shows take over the screen) and Buttercup isn’t really sure what a commercial is.
All Victoria Secret catalogs and other like materials that end up in my mail box go straight into the recycling bin and the other “F” word in our house is “fat.” Conversations and freak-outs about the size of my own ass are limited to texts messages with the BFF or put on public display for the rest of the world to see. We focus all conversations about exercise and food and such around being healthy and strong and having good energy.
And when well-meaning strangers comment on how “big” Buttercup is for her age (she’s about 49 inches tall at four years of age now) I always gently rephrase the statement by responding, “Why yes, she’s very tall, isn’t she?” I say it with a smile.
Always.
You also need to know that I was five feet tall when I was eight years old, wore my mother’s jeans to save money on new clothes, and grew up constantly hearing how “big” I was while sitting in front of Univision or Telemundo watching skantily clad women with long legs and flat stomachs and big, white teeth strut in front of their studio audience of their televised children show. Anyone remember Xuxa? Yeah…she was a porn star and then children everywhere were singing the theme song to the show while our fathers drooled.
I was hiding in the pantry to binge eat by the time I was eight and bulimic by the time I was 15. And obviously, there are still issues I’m dealing with.
Barbie was banned not because I hate perky blondes, but because I thought having a doll like that in our home would undo all I am trying so hard to prevent. I was convinced that Barbie and her body would make my little girl question her own and set up unrealistic expectations and a lifetime of disappointment. And then one day I found myself cruising the toy aisles in search of a birthday gift for one of Buttercup’s little girlfriends. Of course, we found what we were looking for on the shelves directly across the aisle from the Barbie display.
I saw ballerina barbies…
And Skipper and her sister…
And Odette from Swan Lake Barbie…
And (Hot for) teacher Barbie…
And then we saw Wizard of Oz Barbie…
That’s when The Husband whispered something into my ear that sounded something like “no way in hell…”
And that’s when I remembered all the Barbies I grew up playing with and how I never once compared my own prepubescent body to the plastic one I had in my hands and how Barbie was the furthest thing from my mind when I was throwing up whatever I had just binged on. Barbie, I realized, wasn’t my issue. But Barbies skanky enough that the name could be changed to Exotic Dancer Barbie (the dancer’s pole is extra, mom and dad) and her clothing would still match the description?
Yeah….that? I have a serious problem with.
We have a new rule in our house: no skanks allowed. Barbie like I remember from my childhood? Fine by me.
She may end up just as naked just as fast and tossed into the pile of other naked dolls once taken out of the packaging, but at least this way I don’t have to explain a bustier, thigh highs, and stripper heels to a four-year-old.
I’ve found that kids learn way more about their bodies from our attitudes about our own bodies – not the toys they play with. (I openly admit to owning a box full of naked barbies)
Janice- The Fitness Cheerleader recently posted..Motivation Monday: You Can’t Out-Train a Bad Diet
My daughter is 3 and hasn’t had her first Barbie yet. I struggle with little girl things like Barbie, make up, and dress up outfits that are too revealing. I want to put her into dance classes but worry about when she is about 9, the outfits are far too skanky for a little girl when I just want her to learn and enjoy dance.
I like your thoughts on Barbie for your daughter. Barbie is ok, skank is not.
My little girls is only 4 months old, so I haven’t really thought through the whole barbie thing yet. I know I enjoyed playing with her when I was a child, so I am hoping that my daughter can too and that she will be raised knowing NOT to ever compare herself to Barbie. It’s not Barbie on its own that is the issue, its magazines and media as well.
I totally get your point about these new skanky barbies though. uuugh…
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You are setting a good example for your daughter
And, omg, that wizard of oz barbie looks like she’s wearing a naughty halloween costume!
Sarah M recently posted..Mamavation Monday: A whirlwind week!
I’m not a big fan of barbie either not because of how she looks i just never really played much with girly toys. I was more into GI joe toys and action figures. Me and my brother would play hours doing action figure battles and war playing.
I was a tom boy growing up. LOL have a great week
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Yeah, you have come over the the PINK SIDE! I grew up with Barbie, Ken, Midge, Alan, Skipper and the un-named baby that came out as a limited edition once. My Dad made a rather large doll house for them and my Mom spent weeks decorating the thing. My Mom made most of the clothes my dolls wore, including a suit and a wedding dress for Barbie and Ken because there was no way they weren’t getting married. I never compared myself to Barbie and friends for one simple reason: my Mom sat me down and explained what the dimensions translate to in real life. She told me they make the dolls like that so the doll clothes look good on them. They are dolls, not real people. Real people come in all sorts of shapes and sizes and because they are real people they look good in different things. I am with you on the no skank Barbies thing though.